Winders 2000

[-FA- Th|3f]

ok i was emailed this is is soooooooo funny:



WINDOWS 2000 - TENNESSEE EDITION


Dear Consumers:

It has come to our attention that a few copies of the WINDOWS 2000
TENNESSEE EDITION may have accidentally been shipped outside of the
STATE of TENNESSEE.

If you have one of these, you may need help understanding
the commands. The TENNESSEE EDITION may be recognized by the unique
opening screen. It reads: WINDERS 2000, with a background picture of
Willie Nelson superimposed on a bottle of Jack Daniels.


The Recycle Bin is labeled "Outhouse"
My Computer is called "This Dern Contraption"
Dial Up Networking is called "Good Ol' Boys"
Control Panel is known as "The Dashboard"
Hard Drive is referred to as "4-Wheel Drive"
Floppies are "Them little ol' plastic thangs"
Instead of an error message, "Duct Tape" pops up

CHANGES IN TERMINOLOGY IN TENNESSEE EDITION:
Cancel............stopdat
Reset.............try'er agin
Yes...............yep
No................nope
Find..............hunt fer it
Go to.............over yonder
Back..............back yonder
Help..............hep me out here
Stop..............kwitit (WHOA!)
Start.............crank'er up
Settings..........settins
Programs......... stuff at duz stuff
Documents....... .stuff ah done did

Also note that the TENNESSEE EDITION does not recognize capital
letters or punctuation marks. Some programs that are exclusive to
WINDERS 2000:

Tiperiter.....................a word processing program
Colerin' Book.................a graphics program
Cyferin' Mersheen.............calculator
Outhouse Paper................notepad
Inner-net.....................Microsoft explorer 5.0
Pitchers......................a graphics viewer

We regret any inconvenience it may have caused. If you received a
copy of the TENNESSEE EDITION, you may return it to Microsoft for a
replacement version.

I hope this helps all y'all!

Billy Bob Gates

:blue: :blue: :blue: :blue: :blue: :blue: :blue: :blue: :blue: :blue:

[IamTylerDurden]

LMAO.. nice

[Lt.Dan]

Yall probably think that is funny, but down here in Texas we actually have pep's who use those exact words.
You should see the idiots me and Maximus have to put up with. The other day a customer came into the store and told us that the zip 250 drive we installed was not working? So I asked to see the computer….You know….. so we could check it to find out what she obviously was doing wrong!, but strangely all she gave me was an empty box. She thought that I could tell her why her zip drive was not working by looking at her empty zip drive box, and no matter how many times I explained it to her, that I needed to see the computer, she still looked at me like I was the idiot. After about 20 minutes of arguing with her, she finally returned home to get her computer. When she returned again I was amazed. She had brought the monitor in, and the monitor only. Only she did not call it the monitor, she called it the modem...OMG I hate it when people call there computers a MODEM….aahaajajajajalakjsdflajsfl....makes me want to stab them with my pen. Turns out she was just an idiot who had not business using a computer. Luckily we were there to help her. I mean, us being the highly skilled technicians that we are were there to help belittle her for about half an hour. Some days my job can get boring, but on days like these, it makes it all worth it. There is nothing like playing God to the infidels, they must believe everything I say, why…because they know nothing…and if I tell them that there Flux capacitor is going out…they will believe me.. So in the end, we finally got her to bring in her computer. We then charged her $59.99 to format her zip disks, it took about 5 minutes, but we hung on to her system for about 2 days just to make her think the problem was bad and really hard to fix. Why did I do this you ask….because my fellow product specialist we have the power, not them…

[Maximus]

geez Trey, you need a break...and you work 8 hours a week!

[LA_MERC_LaTech]

hahahaha...too funny.

[LA_MERC_Dirge]

LOL I know the feeling. Recently due to retirement, I "assumed" rrsponsibilites for Building Industry Consulting Services along with my other responsibilites. This all means I have an additional phone number forwarded to my desk. Unfortunately, this is one of the main numbers in the phone book for BellSouth. I've already fended off sales people selling cell phones and internet access to us (the phone company). LOL

The taker of the cake was yesterday when a gentleman called to ask to speak to the person responsible for the phone system (in order to sell us some). LMAO I asked him to repeat himself before I broke down in laughter and told him this WAS the phone company!!!!

Still smile at that one.

[Daedelus]

Ahhh haha reminds me of the time when i worked for Babbages/Software Etc. And this mom was doing here christmas shopping for her kids and she comes over and asks will this game(I think it was Wing Commander3)
run on my kids CPU.My first thought was i dont know your kid to know what type of CPU he has lol and so i asked what kind of computer they had, All she said ohhh its a new one.so then i ask her well how new is new and told her a car and a house can be like 5 & 10 years old and still be considered new to someone but cpu's are what like 2 years before there outdated. So she said it was like 9 months old wich isnt that bad and i try to get some specks out of her(Speed;Mobo;Vid Card Etc)
and she hasnt a clue all she says is WELL IT'S TOP OF THE LINE. It even has a coffee cup holder built into it! so i was imagening those little plastic cup colored cup holders you can attach to the inside of a car window(now thats old)and was thinking she had one on the side of her CPU? than she tells me yeah you hit this little button on front of the computer and the coffee tray slides out. i looked at the other sales guys that were listening intently, and almost laughed my ass off. but i had to explain to her that was her CD-Rom not a coffee holder. ROFL when she left the store :laugh:

[Lt.Dan]

oh and geez Matt, I only go to school about 14 hours a week and in the little free time I have work too. So either post something about what is being talked about or shut up! :)