Too Damn Funny

[LA_MERC_Andyconda]

Some of the members have got some funny avatars lately, hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe.

[LA_MERC_Skitsvelvet]

Yeah....

[LA_MERC_BS]

Andy I have a story for you. I go to the Doctors office the other day for my two week check up after my wreck. I go wearing shorts, tee shirt and flip flops. I get put in a room and of course I start looking at all the meaningless photos on the wall. Theres a knock at the door and in comes a nurse. She says that Doctor Wiggins wants Xrays on my pelvis. Well I say lets go get em them. She takes me to another area of the office and sits me down on looked like a park bench. A few minutes later a radiologist wonders around and see's me sitting there. She ask if I need Xrays and I say sure. She takes me into the room and ask what she needed to xray. I tell her that its my pelvis. She grabs a 4 foot by 4 foot paper napkin and places it on the table. She says "drop your pants and cover up with the paper". Oky doky. She walks out of the room with no door. I look around and see no one walking bay the opening of the room, so I take my shorts off and throw them on the floor much like I do at my own home. Then I come off with the under wear. They too end up on the floor a few inches away from my shorts. I jump onto the table and cover up my boys with the over size napkin. I notice immediatly that the table is cold. I wait for a few minutes and decided to stretch out a little bit. As I lay on my back I put my hands behind my neck and start relaxing. In comes the radioligist. She get to the table and has that big ole board thing in her hand. She stops.... looks at the floor..... looks back at me and ask "are you naked?" I say yep. She busted out laughing at me. She only wanted me to take off my shorts because of the zipper. Now she is all freaked out and can't stop laughing. Yes I am embarrassed now. She is so messed up she made me point to my hip so she didn't accidentally hit my pickle. I could have told her that would never happen. Well Xrays are done and I get dressed. I go back to my room, but not before asking the radioligist to keep that little screw between us. Oh no, every nurse in the office found out. They all had to come back and make smart remarks. Even the doctor got in on it. Worst day I had all week.

[Chi_Townz]

heh heh heh heh

he said pickle

[LA_MERC_YellowDog]

Well, I bet she got some good X-rays. LOL

[LA_MERC_Dragonlady[s]]

Aww Jerry you poor thing....:heart3



SORRY BUT

I have to LOL at you for that......

:LOL1 :LOL1 :LOL1 :LOL1 :LOL1 :LOL1 :LOL1 :LOL1 :LOL1 :LOL1 :LOL1

[LA_MERC_YellowDog]

Speaking of Radiologist and X rays. This is not a long story, but...

My, Now Ex-Girlfriend, is a Ultrasound Tech, she comes over to the house and tells about a patient that Radiology had that day... Well it seems that the Man and his Wife/Girlfriend like to get a little weird in there sexual encounters. The guy comes into the emergency room complaining of abdominal pains. Well they send him back to Radiology to do some x-rays of lower intestines; abdomen and such guess what was causing this guy so much pain? "See if I can keep this clean" This guy has stuck in what is suppose to be an exit only orifice...Not a sex toy as you might suspect, BUT a Texas Pete bottle, she swore to me that in the x-ray you could almost read the label on the bottle, and to top it off it was full of hot sauce.
This guy swore he wasn’t into that kind of thing, but his "Woman" did it to him while having sex. He was the butt of every joke for the rest of the day in ultrasound and radiology.

I hope the bottle don’t leak…

[LA_MERC_MadMAX]

Yeah - if that bottle started leaking, I think the guy would have made up a new kind of dance!

[LA_MERC_Wetzny]

Come Clean Yellowdog....It's always the "other" guy! lol. This one time at band camp......:band

[LA_MERC_YellowDog]

']Come Clean Yellowdog....It's always the "other" guy! lol. This one time at band camp......:band


OH NO YOU DIDNT GO THERE!!!


I swear on the grave of Wetzny.."Who Im headed out to kill" this story IS about the OTHER guy...

[LA_MERC_Shadow]

OK first, off give the texas pete guy a break, maybe he was just trying a new colonic.

Here's one for ya....

I'm working at Charity hosp in NO in the Neuro ICU so we generally have really sick patients that have head injuries and are therefore, screwed in the head, or don't know what's going on.

Well, we have this big dude come in one day; he had gotten in a wreck on his way home from the airport. He'd been out of the contry for 4 months (I think in kuwait or something) so he hadn't seen his wife in a while and was in a hurry. Anyway, he's a really nice guy and me and the other male nurses get along with him great so we're a little slack on the rules with him. He had messed up his back and was to have surgery like 2 days after the accident. His wife comes in to see him before he goes to surgery in the morning. Now, at charity's icu there are no private rooms just curtains between the beds in one big room...so no real privacy. He tells me that he wants to be alone with his wife for a while so me and the other nurse say sure and close off his curtains (it's about midnight and all the other beds are open so we can see the monitors and patients). Of course we hear some noises and turn on the tv so as not to disturb them; then the house supervisor, Alex, who can be a real jerk comes walking in checking us out to make sure everything's cool for the night. He see's the curtain drawn and says that we're not supposed to close them it's not safe for the patient. I tell him the guys fine he just wanted privacy he visiting with his wife. Alex tells me that that doesn't matter and it's past visiting hours. I tell him just to leave the guy alone. Alex then proceeds to walk over to the guys bed and pull back the curtain and prepares to tell the guy she has to leave. But Alex looks at them, the guy looks up at him and tells him loudly "Hi ya doing?! I don't mind if u watch but u need to close ur mouth first." Alex turns completely red, closes the curtains and heads right out the door. Turns out she was blowing him at the time.

Alex never opened another curtain again on our unit.

[LA_MERC_Dirge]

LMAO @ "close your mouth first"

[LA_MERC_YellowDog]

LMAO... Now thats a good one... Looks like Alex might learn to get a clue the next time.