LA_MERC_MadMAX
August 30th, 2005, 10:05 PM
Sometimes when I reflect on all the beer I drink, I feel ashamed.
Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery
and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they
might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. ?I think,
"It is better to drink this beer and let their dreams come true than
be selfish and worry about my liver."
Babe Ruth
An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with
his fools.
Ernest Hemingway
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
Paul Hornung
24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. ?Coincidence?
I think not.
H.L. Mencken
When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. ?When
we fall asleep, we commit no sin. ?When we commit no sin, we go to
heaven. ?So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!
George Bernard Shaw
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
Benjamin Franklin
Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is
beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but
the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
Dave Barry
Beer: helping ugly people have sex since 3000 b.c.
W.C. Fields
Remember "I" before "E", except in Budweiser.
Professor Irwin Corey
To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a "support group." ?Salvationin a
can!
Leo Durocher
And the number one reason to drink beer......One night at Cheers, Cliff
Clavin explained the "Buffalo Theory" to his buddy, Norm...
"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only moveas
fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the
slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This
natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general
speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular
killing of the weakest members. ?In much the same way, the human brain
can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. ?Excessive intake
of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks
the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular
consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the
brain a faster and more efficient machine! That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers!"
Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery
and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they
might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. ?I think,
"It is better to drink this beer and let their dreams come true than
be selfish and worry about my liver."
Babe Ruth
An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with
his fools.
Ernest Hemingway
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
Paul Hornung
24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. ?Coincidence?
I think not.
H.L. Mencken
When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. ?When
we fall asleep, we commit no sin. ?When we commit no sin, we go to
heaven. ?So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!
George Bernard Shaw
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
Benjamin Franklin
Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is
beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but
the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
Dave Barry
Beer: helping ugly people have sex since 3000 b.c.
W.C. Fields
Remember "I" before "E", except in Budweiser.
Professor Irwin Corey
To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a "support group." ?Salvationin a
can!
Leo Durocher
And the number one reason to drink beer......One night at Cheers, Cliff
Clavin explained the "Buffalo Theory" to his buddy, Norm...
"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only moveas
fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the
slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This
natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general
speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular
killing of the weakest members. ?In much the same way, the human brain
can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. ?Excessive intake
of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks
the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular
consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the
brain a faster and more efficient machine! That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers!"